Stuff that's too long for my AIM profile

My gym is full of wack jobs. I don't know if it's Bethesda or what; Crunch in SF was kind of snobby but not filled with so many weir...

Chickens have very simple social lives. They can remember the appearance and social stature of up to about 40 chickens, and they function fi...

I really wish DHA (the active ingredient in self-tanners) didn't smell like feet. I don't want to be all wrinkly and Magda-like in f...

Hi. As a girl who likes her sleep, I have to say, call is cruel. Last night I got about 2.5 hours of sleep (a bragable number, actually) but...

I got a new driver's license photo this week. It's a good thing; in my old one I looked about fourteen (I was sixteen when it was ta...

It turns out that Chappelle's Show season 1 is the top selling DVD ever. I love both seasons (Season 2 is the third highest seller), but...

[21:05] madelineadele: ME TOOOOOO [21:05] madelineadele: I WAS WATCHING ST PEPPERS THE OTHER DAUY [21:05] madelineadele: AND IT BLOES [21:05...

You heard it here first: Tristan Prettyman is the next big thing. It's kind of sad to realize this is true as I write it, because that m...

The last three DVDs I've watched (rentals from Blockbuster) have all started with a lame, psuedo-edgy public service message about how d...

Last night as I was coming home on the Metro I saw a stylish girl get off at Cleveland Park. Her jacket caught my eye first, but then I saw ...

Surprising: I've never tried typing in allishop.com before. No two words go together better in the english language, and I never put ...

My new gym is definitely the most germ-conscious gym I've belonged to. After their cardio session, every gymgoer takes the time to spray...

What is up with Vera Bradley bags? For some reason young women east of the Mississippi are obsessed with them. They look like rolled-up quil...

Airplane bathrooms are like points on Drew Carey's show "Whose Line is it Anyway?" They don't matter. Think about it: most...

I made a mistake when I signed up for the Ironman next summer. Not the way you think, I'm still glad I'm registered. No, I'm ref...

One thing is true: there is nothing valuable about snow. The way I see it, snow is water that's biounavailable. It's beauty is fleet...

I'm sorry I'm naysaying so much lately. It's like a tsunami of negativity. You can quote me on that. I thought I had it rough in...

Now this is story all about how my bike got clipped by a car downtown and I'd like to take a minute just sit right there, I'll tell ...

I was shopping for a G-unit necklace for my Mom, and I came upon this blurb: "The G unit necklace is revolutionary. The G unit necklace...

Yeah, so: This month's Lucky magazine proudly features white hospital shoes as the new "in thing." Apparently the coolest girl...

I love the random queries I get from strangers that want to add me to their myspace list. Invariably it's some local dude who 'reall...

There's nothing better than a relaxing Saturday morning with a grande Americano, an open schedule, and a crazy race against the clock to...

Does knowing you have a spare key make you more careless, and more likely to lose your key? This is a question of the ages. Regardless, I ne...

You know those hairstyling magazines they have at the salon? You always end up looking at them while you're waiting for your running-lat...

I ran into the cutest kid today. I was on a run on the Capitol Crescent Trail and I was being all meticulous about measuring my mile splits...

If Sinatra were alive, he could definitely afford a trip around the moon. For $100 million, you can buy your very own lunar mission. Read th...

Last night a thunderstorm threatened San Antonio just after sunset, at around 8:30 pm. The clouds were the strangest, most beautiful color o...

Death by PowerPoint has inspired me to sink to new depths in classroom misbehavior: the lecture bingo game. It only took one and a half lect...

Gwen Stefani is going Jackson on us. Her music videos for the L.A.M.B. album are just plain weird, and her songs—while they sound cool—a...

My 24th birthday is coming up. I'm excited, because I've always had this vague feeling that age 24 would be great, a fun year to rem...

This weekend I went to Silver Cycles to get some lube for my chain. It was five bucks, and I felt bad paying for that with my credit card......

My imaginary pedestrian zapping weapon, complete with imaginary red buttons.

I'd make an awful guy. I know I'd be really bad at guy-type things, like throwing a baseball, and they'd all make fun of me for ...

In order to increase the likelihood that I will finish a marathon this fall, I entered this wacky 200 mile relay called Tom's Run. Runne...

I feel so free! I just downloaded Trillian and got rid of AIM and Yahoo Messenger. It's somewhat lacking; for example, I don't think...

I've been addicted to "America's Next Top Model" all day. It's pathetic, all right? I know. But I needed something to ...

I can sing again! Now that the coughing has completely subsided, my vocal cords are happy and my voice has returned to its former glory. Uh....

I'm still sick. Sense of smell is still MIA. But did this keep me from doing a triathlon today? Hell no! I actually wanted to bail in th...

I'm sick. (cough cough) It's mostly a minor annoyance, except for the fact that I missed the Sallie Mae 10K today. I've been lo...

The other night I got off Metro at Downtown Bethesda, alone. The combination of my solitude and the quality of the night's darkness allo...

Twice a year, we screw with our clocks and run a very good risk of showing up an hour early or late for something important. Bill Gates has ...

I like to think my grammar is decent, and while I'm not the best storyteller in the world, I can pull random SAT words out of my ass in ...

Welcome to Alli's Easter Egg Hunt! At the end, open up your eggs to get great prizes, such as your car, your house keys, and your luggag...

I didn't grow up on the beach, okay? If there's one thing I can't stand, it's the inescapable stereotype that accompanies a ...

I seriously have scurvy. I got home just a few minutes ago from Jamaica and I had this uncontrollable urge to eat a vitamin tablet. I follow...

Last spring I was part of a focus group for this Neutrogena hair care line for people with really dry hair, and at the time I thought focus ...

Alli's back! After a brief Starbucks hiatus, I'm readdicted and trippin on the juice. The habit built up so slowly I didn't even...

I think the thing I miss most about California are the bathrooms. I have simple expectations; when I walk into a bathroom, I expect a few st...

I've always wondered whether food wants to be eaten. It could go either way, really. Think about it: when a kernel of rice falls from yo...

So I have to study the brain for the next three months. It's funny when you think that I spent three months studying the whole rest of t...

I have this weird paranoid version of solipsism. It involves the classic view of oneself as a "special case," but in my pathos I...

Medical school has unfurled before me a wave of self-discovery. Things I never knew about myself include: I'm an anorexic dissector. ...

ok, everyone relax!

me as flight leader at COT

I've been keeping a running tally in my head of things that are different in Maryland from back home, and whether it's a plus or a m...

DRAMARAMA Because my life is so boring I have to make up little stories about the everyday occurences in my life, and convince myself tha...

I had a random thought this morning, before 5am, as I struggled to wake up for good. I kept hitting snooze, and I realized I was screwing my...

I'm reading a fantastic novel called "Like the Red Panda," by Andrea Siegel. The main character, Stella, shares my outlook on ...

I've been sitting here for the last few hours scouring iTunes for songs that express exactly how I'm feeling right now. I'd feel...

It just hit me that today is my last day as a San Franciscan. I'm gonna miss the hell out of this place. I know I complain and bitch abo...

Why not try some new songs? My most recent playlist: 1. In Our Darkest Hour/Phantom Planet 2. Stockholm Syndrome/Muse 3. Spitting Games...

JOIE DE VIVRE I'm in love with my life! I'm perfect. There's nothing about my life I would change! Barf, right? For the re...

One criticism of Buddhism that I've heard is that to be a perfect Buddha, you don't need anyone in the world to exist at all-- all y...

SIX DEGREES OF RANDY NEWMAN Today, a patient came in with orders from Dr. Newman, an oncologist here in SF. One of our doctors, Dr. Mille...

Don't you just love those little flashy buzzy coasters restaurants give you while you're waiting for a table? I do. In fact, I wish ...

I feed my sense of self-importance sometimes with random seizures of authority. I'm not sure why, but having a job to do and doing it ma...

What would you do if you were 12 weeks pregnant (work with me here, fellas) and you discovered you had cancer? Let's say it was breast c...

On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate my innocence? 1 being not at all innocent, and 10 being minister's daughter. I ask because I f...

I can't stand how provincial and self-absorbed the SF Chronicle is. Last Friday, the front page of every other newspaper on the country ...

A hallmark of immaturity is throwing the concept of love around like a frisbee. For example, telling somebody you may or may not like, ...